The early returns are in. Â Heroin addicts in the greater Hartford area have cast two votes for Donald Trump (Using empty heroin bags I found in an area commuter lot as a proxy).
Questions. Â Â Did the dealer stamp half his bags with Donald Trump and the other half with Hillary Clinton in order to provide proper choice to all his clients. Â â€œI got Clinton and I got Trump, what do you want? Â Youâ€™re a libertarian? Â F-you. Â Its Trump or Clinton, make up your mind. Â If he only has Trump and the user if a Hillary Supporter, do the Clinton backer say, well, Iâ€™ve got the shakes and Iâ€™m gonna be sick, but under no circumstances will I buy Donald Trump heroin. Â Guess Iâ€™ll have to just deal with withdrawal on my own or until my dealer gets some Hillary in.â€
When given a choice between the two, who would you expect a heroin user to Â really prefer. Â The candidate who promises hard time for drug offenses? Â Or the one who promises free room and board at a rehab facility of their choice? Â A possible fellow criminal or fellow non-taxpayer? Â Dis this heroin user or users heroin even know who Donald Trump is? Â Is the heroin user a business professional who had to shoot up in the commuter lot to have the strength to go to work? Â Or did they meet their dealer on their lunch hour? Â Or were they divorced and out work and living out of their car because heroin had caused them to throw everything precious to them away in pursuit of the next fix? Â F -Donald Trump and F-Hillary Clinton, I just want the heroin.
Letâ€™s say the dealer only has Donald Trump. Â So what was he thinking? In what way is the dealer using Donald Trump for his heroin marketing? Â Does he really love Donald Trump and think he is an marker for excellence in the same way some dealers put A+, check mark, â€œGreat job! And a light bulb on their bags? Â Maybe he thinks represents a strong military so instead of putting an AK47 or an atomb bomb on the bag, he puts Donald Trump. Â Maybe he is putting Trump on his heroin bags in the same way other dealers put the Grim Reaper , Bio Hazard and Skull and Cross Bones on their bags? Â Or maybe in the same way other dealers put Crazy, Far Out and WTF on theirs? Â Maybe his pitch is simply Trump — it will F you up!
Ah, to be omnipotent and all-knowing.
Come election day weâ€™ll see if the heroin bag indicator proves to be a positive or negative forecast, and in the meantime, you can count on Medicscribe to keep you updated on the latest counts.